Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Things lost this week

Money: Spent Monday at home despairing and drinking. A plumber had come over to fix the cistern of my loo, and I'd anticipated the cost would be around £100. Steep, but worth it for a loo that flushes properly, I'm sure you'll agree. He estimated the job would take two hours. OK, so that's £150, expensive but I can afford it (just). When, after two hours, he announced that he had to go and drive to Shepherd's Bush to get a part, I cracked open the vodka. He was gone another two hours (traffic accident in Holland Park, don't you know), then took another hour to install the part. Total bill? £478.10. Happy Christmas! Thinking of having a party and making everyone drink loads of beer, then charging 50p to wee in the most expensive toilet in South London.

Pride: At the Actionettes Christmas club, I
a) approached a guy I thought I knew, only to have him back away with a look of fear in his eyes.
b) Played music for 45 minutes, and on my way out of the DJ booth accidentally jogged a turntable and made the record skip and then stop... It was the DJs first track and she glared at me with hatred. I hid backstage for ten minutes, and drank more.

From these experiences I can deduce two things: 1) It'd be easy for me to be an alcoholic and 2) I'd probably enjoy it a lot.

1 comment:

Inspector Gadgette said...

Nearly 500 squid to get the flaming lav fixed!!!!

Holy moly. You could have got a complete new suite for that!

There are only two things to go wrong in a bog.

1. Ballcock.
2. Siphon.

Either cost just a few pounds, and only take a few minutes to fit.

Perhaps, as you like crafts, you ought to take a course in basic plumbing- save yourself a small fortune!